Seven years ago I married my best friend, Jessica. I was a wizened old 39 year old man who was convinced that marriage just wasn't in the offing yet there I was, exchanging vows with my beautiful bride. The day was unique for a couple reasons, besides actually being my wedding day. First off, it was 105 degrees outside which was the hottest day in Vancouver for about 50 years. All of our wedding photos are diminished because of the giant sweat stains on my shirt and the white towel I slung over my shoulder to dry my head and face is in each picture, Luckily, I was wearing only a silk shirt and slacks instead of traditional tuxedo-wear. I may have passed out in a tux. The other unique thing is that I have only vague recollections about the day. Between the heat, my nerves, my age, and other disabilities, I only recall snippets of the day. Here is what sticks out:
1. My wife-to-be stayed the night at a hotel the night before we got married because of the whole "Bad luck to see your bride" thing but I stayed at our home (Yes, we were living together prior to the wedding like any other pair of sinners). I remember sleeping in until about 10:00 am and waking up to the pulsing thought echoing in my brain, "Holy shit this is happening." It wasn't a scared thing but rather something else. Actually now that I think about it, it was definitely a scared thing. I was petrified. I was an ancient bachelor with anxieties about commitment who was resigned to staying single forever. But as I awoke that August 16th, I was mere hours from getting married. I started sweating right then and didn't stop until nightfall. 
2. It was about noon and I realized that I didn't know when I was supposed to be at the location. We were having our ceremony and reception at the Grant House in downtown Vancouver, an outdoor venue, and in what would become a precursor to the next seven years, I really didn't know what I was supposed to be doing. One of Jessica's friends offered her services to us as our wedding planner as our wedding gift which we accepted. That turned out to be a horrible idea as this woman threw us the wedding that she had always wanted. Jessica had some input but I had absolutely zero which wouldn't have bothered me if Jessica were the one calling the shots. Neither one of us has spoken with our planner much the past seven years. Anyway, I must have lost my printed agenda because I really didn't know when I was due at the Grant House. Maybe our planner didn't give me one because I was so secondary to the festivities. Anyway, I called my best man, Kit, and he came by to pick me up at about 3:00. 
3. We got married at 5:00 and the time between 3:00 and 5:00 is pretty much erased from my mind. I assume I was playing host but I'm not sure. I know my wife was upstairs with her wedding party getting all pretty and drinking bottle after bottle of champagne. I couldn't even eat anything I was so nervous. These two hours are the black hole of my memory, only memorable for not being remembered. 
4. At around 5:15 I stood on the steps of the Grant House with our Universal Light pastor (brother-in-law Josh) while the wedding party slowly and in pairs walked down the aisle. Finally, I saw Jessica for the first time in 24 hours as she rounded the corner with her dad. That vision is BY FAR the most memorable thing of that day (perhaps my strongest memory ever). She was radiant. Beautiful. Dazzling. Stunning. Gorgeous. Breathtaking. And she was smiling like she was having the best time ever which immediately made me relax tremendously. Even as I type this I can't stop smiling because that memory is so strong and awesome. She was a vision. And in hindsight I think she was smiling because she was drunk. And good for her!
5. We said our self-composed vows (I borrowed from Depeche Mode and she from Johnny Cash) and the next strong memories are the toasts that Kit and Jessica's dad made. Kit talked about how much he loved Jessica and his only regret was that my mom wasn't around to share the day. It was a great speech and straight from the heart. Then Mike toasted to our happiness and that he liked this husband much better than Jessica's first one because he was a dick. I love Mike. 
6. The reception was there on the lawn of the Grant House and it turned out to be a really nice party. We went through a few kegs of beer and cases of wine and from what people tell me, a good time was had by all. I honestly don't hardly remember any of it and I wasn't even drinking.
7. Our wedding night was spent at a sweet hotel in downtown Portland where we ate some of our wedding food (Thanks to Jessica's friend Tara who squirreled some away for us while we were making the post-ceremony rounds). I vividly remember sitting on the bed with Jessica and watching Michael Phelps swim in the summer Olympics while spending an hour removing what seemed like a hundred spiral metal clips or something from Jessica's hair. The hair looked amazing but those spiral things were such a pain to get out. I pulled a lot of hair out that night. We left for our San Francisco honeymoon the next morning.
So even though so much of my wedding day is a blur, some of the images are burned forever into my mind. In a million years I will never forget setting eyes on my wife the first time that day. I think that some people who were there may read this so please don't be offended that I don't recall much about that day. It was 105 out! 
The past seven years have been the best seven of my life. I have the best wife in the world and between the two of us (and medical science!!) we have the absolute best kid on the planet. Frances is a gift and she is the best parts of us. All my fears of commitment have gone away and I have grown into this husband thing. I really enjoy being a husband and dad and I think it brings out my best. 
Because of the events of seven years ago today I have gained a wonderful partner, an amazing daughter, a new fantastic family (Jessica's family is the best and has treated me so well), and even a sense of peace that I never had before. Thanks to my wife for these seven years and I can't wait to see what tomorrow holds!
Love you tons.

Today was a pretty good day. I spent the morning at school in an in-service dealing with our iPad use. There was 6.5 hours slated for some hands-on learning and it promised to be informative. But of course the universe has a sense of humor and since it was a class on technology, our Internet service wouldn’t work. There were about ten Instructional Technology Facilitators (ex-teachers who work at the district on technology) there who were excited and ready to present and lead this class and the internet went down. Irony anyone?

What was truly impressive was how all of them handled it. They tap danced a bit but presented some relevant information and even though our web use wasn’t available, they were informative and helpful. It was really impressive to see them rise to what was a very serious challenge. The second and final day of the course is tomorrow and I’m sure the internet will be working and awesome and we can build on what we learned today. But good job ITF people! You were troopers today!

In the vein of technology, last year I spent about three months as an education columnist for an online newspaper, golocalpdx.com and I wrote about a dozen columns before retiring after realizing that teaching and fatherhood kept me plenty busy enough. Here is my column from about ten months ago on education and social media:

                                                         Teaching and Twitter

I had to explain what America Online was to one of my students last Friday which made me feel even older than I am. Also, when I tell them that I didn’t use a computer until my first year of teaching, they are dumbfounded. I remember using a gradebook that I’d write in with a pencil. I remember mimeograph machines with that purple ink. I remember writing on an actual chalkboard. But now my students have iPads provided by the district. The students can check their grades in about 4 seconds on their smartphone or iPad. I can have a guest speaker come to my classroom via Skype. Every AP student of mine maintains a blog where they post their essays. Technology has definitely made a gigantic impact on education, both in the classroom and out, but I think my favorite new “techie” thing is the use of Twitter.

For the uninitiated, Twitter is a social media application where a user creates a profile with a name (it is a @ sign followed by your user name. Mine is @benjatos) and sends out messages/status updates which are limited to 140 or fewer characters. You can also select people to follow and their status updates are what you see when you log on to Twitter. You can tweet photos or links to articles or a plethora of social media wonderment. There are also hashtags (#). They look like that. A user can put a hashtag on a tweet and another user can search for anything under that hashtag and be shown every tweet with the given hashtag. It’s a way to build community and organize messages.

For me, I use it to follow educators, sports folk, some news sources, and some of my friends. It is truly an amazing tool to get news sometimes. I remember recently that when the Ferguson protests were happening Twitter was ablaze with tweets from people inside the protest providing minute-by-minute updates that major news channels weren’t reporting until hours later, if at all. It is a powerful tool. It’s also a fun place to “watch” a sporting event. I can just refresh my Twitter feed as a Blazer game goes on and be kept up to date, with some fabulous snarky commentary thrown in.

For a teacher, we can learn a lot about teaching and impact others by participating in Twitter. The main two are connecting with other teachers and motivating students.

Connecting with other educators

This is by far the greatest thing for teachers to utilize. There are so many powerful educators across the world and Twitter grants access to any of them who use the tool. I have read so many wonderful articles that were tweeted out by educators I’ve never met but who are incredible. It can be like professional development as well. There are people who have chats, using a given hashtag, and participate in in depth educational discourse across the globe. I feel like my skills as an educator have been greatly enhanced just by following some of the people/educators I follow. They’re inspiring, passionate, and have a lot of knowledge to share.

Motivating students

A great number of my students follow me on Twitter which is pretty cool. It enables me to reach them on a different level, tweeting out things like, “My second period class dominated their writing assignment today!” Or even personal mentions like, “Special shout out to @kidstudentlearner for writing his best essay of the year.” Students eat this up. It is meeting kids on their turf a little bit but it’s not overly intrusive. Warning: When I started using Twitter I made the mistake of following a student of mine. I learned things about him I really didn’t want to know so I quickly unfollowed him. Some things should just remain unknown.

Suggested users to follow

@dianeravetch
My favorite educational follow. She links to some awesome writing and her take on education is a must read. She also linked to one of my pieces on here so I automatically love her.

@burgessdave
He wrote an incredible book, Teach like a Pirate, and leads education chats most every Monday night.

@gcouros
Principal in Canada who is so far ahead of everyone else in technology it’s humbling. Also has a great blog.

@SuptVPS
Superintendent of Vancouver Public Schools who is also way out in front of most everyone else on the technology front.

@evolvededucator
Teacher in Chicago who links to some fantastic articles

@BadassTeachersA
The Badass Teachers Association is committed to fighting the corporate takeover of public education in America and when you follow them it is like an education all by itself.

@casas_jimmy
Principal and motivational speaker and I’d love to meet this guy.

@valeriestrauss
Writes about education for the Washington Post.

@GetUpStandUp2
Author Susan DeFresne and a Kindergarten teacher activist

George Couros is my favorite follow of those because he blogs and his writings are honestly transformative.
 
And now my literature review:
Shunned by Meredith Hall
This is a 2013 essay and I love it. It deals with a senior in high school (Hall) who gets pregnant in 1966. Upon her pregnancy, she is barred from school, barred from home, and basically barred from her small town because as she puts it, "...a girl in Hampton let herself be had in the gritty sand by a boy from away who said love." It is a sad and scary story that resonates well even today.
Essay: 10 of 10
It's written very well and is interesting throughout. It's a bit over 6,000 words so it isn't overwhelmingly long (Ten Microsoft word pages) and can be finished at one brief sitting, Hall conveys  not only her frustration and being shunned by everyone, but also her utter numbness as she went through the whole ordeal. The reader feels right alongside Hall. 
Teachability: 10 of 10
I may grade these super easy but I only review things I like. I like this essay. The shunning of a pregnant high school girl in 2015 isn't nearly as bad as it was in 1966 but shunning overall is still a thing. There is importance in putting the "mean girls" syndrome in the light for discussion, examination, and hopefully, eradication. Classroom discussion of this piece would be wonderful and a personal narrative writing assignment about a time a student felt shunned or misunderstood would be well-received. There is power in this essay and kids would learn lots. 

The family made it home from camping and it was nice to see their smiling faces. They were both completely filthy and smelly after roughing it in the woods for a day. I'm not much of a camper so I'm not sure how much grime is normal but this really seemed excessive. The both had a blast which is more than I can say so good on them. Frances my daughter scraped her shin, complete with a developing red scab, and is limping around the house. I think I'll enroll her in some acting classes. Jessica my wife got home, took a shower, ate some lunch, and then left to get her hair cut and toes prettied up. That seems like the perfect suburban thing to do after camping. 
I start AP training tomorrow which will run for four days. It's August so I'm getting into school mode and class tomorrow sounds wonderful. I've trained in AP English the past two summers and since next year one of my AP Junior classes is teaming with AP US History, I'm taking the US History training. I'm super stoked for it. My last history class was when I was 18 years old and it was called Early Human Civilization: 3,000 BC to 1,500 AD. I loved it. It was my first quarter of college and my first blue book exam during finals. The professor was almost 80 years old and lectured an hour per day, every day. This class also generated one of my strongest collegiate memories. 
It was the night before the final exam and I hadn't studied at all. I laid my textbook and class notes out on my desk with a highlighter and legal pad and sat down, ready to begin studying at 9:00 PM, 11 hours before my final. I sat at my desk and stared at my tools. Then I stared some more. I flipped through my notes. I opened and closed my book. After a few minutes of this I had the most troubling thought, "Shit. I've never studied in my life and I don't know how." For the next ten minutes I sweated and panicked and cursed high school for being so easy. I had never cracked a book open in my 18 years of life to study. I had never done homework. I had never had to even try at school because it came so easy. I finally called my dad and told him my predicament. He just laughed at me and said, "Yes! I've been waiting for this call!" He took about 15 minutes and told me some different ways to cement the material, which I then put to use for the whole night. I left my dorm at 7:30 without sleep and made my way to the classroom. There was 50 kids in the class at 8:00 when our professor walked into the room, asked us if we had our blue books (he told us to bring two), and proceeded to walk to the front chalkboard and write down one question: "Describe the events that took place from 3,000 BC to 1,500 AD and how they connect." It was the best question I'd ever read and I was so prepared. The final was three hours long and I used the whole time and both of my blue books answering the one solitary question. When I finished, I had been the only student in the classroom for at least 20 minutes. I turned it in to the prof (forget his name) and he asked me how I did. I told him that I'd pulled an all-nighter and I'd absolutely nailed it. He said, "We'll see" and shuffled out of the room. I went back to my dorm and passed out until 9:00 that night when I did the thing all over again study for a psychology final. After Christmas break I received my final exam score of 4.0 and had never been more proud of myself. It was a really cool moment and one of my better days.
When I'm Gone by Rafael Zoehler
I read this earlier today thinking it was a true story and it absolutely kicked me in the crotch. I may have sniffled out a tear or two. Then later I found out it was fiction and I was disappointed. Not sure now how I feel about that. Great read though.
Story: 10 of 10
It's a first-person narrative piece by a man whose father died when he was eight years old. His dad left him a box of letters to be opened up during important milestones in the authors life. They were things like, "When you have a giant fight with Mom," and "QWhen you have your first kiss," and "When you have your first child," and finally, "When your time comes," which the author opens up when he's 86 years old. It's a great hook for a story and I really, really wanted it to be true. 
Teachability: 10 of 10
KIDS WILL LOVE THIS. Seriously. They will absolutely go mad for this piece but would like it better if it were true so I think that I won't tell them it's fiction until after we discuss it. Now go read it.

It is Friday night at 9:17 and my wife and daughter are camping up on Mt. Hood somewhere. They left today at about 1:00 and I'm Joe Bachelor for 24 hours. So what have I done today? Hmmm... I went to Safeway to buy pasta and a couple snacky-things for eating. Then I came home and made spaghetti while watching a crappy movie on HBO. Then at 4:00 I watched the Mariners choke away another baseball game. At 6:30 I felt like I needed to leave the house to prove that I am a man with a man card and I'm not the most boring person in the world. So I drove almost a mile and put $20 of gas in the jeep. And then I turned around and came back home because I realized that I am actually the world's most boring person. I arrived, microwaved some chili, watched a little bit of distraction on the telly, and read my book for a few. Throw in doing dishes and taking out the recycling and you have my day. Now it is 9:21 and I have started a blog entry. I will be in bed by 10:00 and asleep by 11:00. Yep, I am living large!!
Is this what happens when one gets married? I used to be exciting, periodically vibrant even. Now I get 24 hours of solo living and I do nothing. Next week is going to be weird. The wife and kid leave again to fly to a wedding and will be gone from Thursday through Sunday. I might not even take a shower. I'll be like that guy from the movie Singles who after getting dumped, stays at home eating delivery pizza and growing a beard for weeks in an abyss of depression. I'm not really depressed that they're gone and that I'm home alone, I'm more just bored and apathetic. I think next week I will actually plan some activities for myself instead of relying on my lack of spontaneity. 
Tomorrow they will return and I will have our living quarters cleaned and vacuumed. In the morning I will attack a list of things I need to get done  Then when they show up about 1 or 2 I will give some hugs and kisses and I won't be bored again.
This is perhaps the most pathetic blog post of my life. Who am I?
Death to the Chicken Finger by Adam McDowell
This is an interesting article about how adult palates are growing and maturing yet our children are doing the opposite. The author mentions that parents nowadays feed their kids things that are mostly beige, which is a sweet image and sadly pretty true. As a parent of a four-year-old who is a picky eater I can relate to this a great deal. Frances eats a lot of pasta with cheese and butter. It's pretty much her favorite thing ever, It's also beige. 
Article: 10 of 10
I hated it because I felt like the author could have started it with, "Dear Ben," and then written his damn article. OK Mr. Adam McDowell... my kid will eat some more Goddamn vegetables and I won't just give in to her because I don't want to deal with her tantrums. You win. I get it. 
Teachability: Not sure. 
From an academic standpoint it's probably not worth much but I'm really curious to see how prevalent this is. How much beige did my students eat while growing up? It could be really unique conversation starter but I don't know where or how I'd tie it into curriculum. Maybe a health teacher could use it. Or early childhood development. Or culinary arts. Or maybe I'll just give a copy of it to every pregnant student in school. 
It's 9:50 and I'm going to bed. Good night all.